This blog is now on hiatus. I haven't worked with resin in months and it's probably going to stay that way. The jewelry thing was fun and I have a pretty nifty collection of stuff to wear now but I'm not going to sell any more. It's time to focus on the road to graduate school. I'm about to start applying to programs for 2011. I have a blog dedicated more to art type stuff: http://cynthiaburton.blogspot.com. I'm working on mixing two crafts, baking and crocheting, into new artwork. These two things have really consumed me since last summer. I learned to bake and crochet while marooned at my mother's house out in the Utah desert last summer. I was staying with her for a few months before moving out to Mass with my boyfriend. I was so bored and miserable out at my mother's place that I took up two new crafts in the hopes of keeping busy. I've learned so much about both crochet and baking. I think they saved my life. I don't think I would have made it through that summer if I hadn't found something to keep my brain busy. I was spending most of my time laying in bed wanting to cry because I had no one to talk to, my boyfriend was thousands of miles away and I felt like I had no future.
I want to honor these skills and the impact they had on my life through art. My biggest problem right now is that I lack a space to display/assemble these ideas I'm having. I'm really excited for graduate school because that will give me the space and resources I need to make the work that's been bouncing around in my head for the last couple months.
It's time to move on to the next stage of my life and I can't wait for it to get here!
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
FEELING BLAH
I've been really blah and unhappy lately. I haven't been able to make enough money selling jewelry to fund my half of our expenses, not even close, and so have been looking for a new regular job. I'm not happy about it. The idea of spending that much time and energy on something I don't care about really gets me down. I don't have a choice though. I can't expect Jon to shoulder all the costs of living with his student loans and per diem job at the mental health clinic. My family is helping with money but my mother is constantly complaining that she's broke so I don't expect much help from her. Everything my family does is very helpful monetarily. They're not the most pleasant bunch if you need emotional support but when it comes to money they can be helpful.
I'm not having any more luck finding a new job than I was selling jewelry. Actually I'd say I'm having more luck with the jewelry even though I've only made one sale in the last couple months. I've come to accept that only a very few people want my jewelry. There are so many resin artists on Etsy and most of them make more interesting stuff than I do. I can't compete. The resin thing just isn't working so it's time to pack it up and move on. I'm trying to put my efforts towards building a portfolio for graduate school but it's hard not to feel depressed over my failure. I was so excited to start making jewelry full time but it's so hard to maintain that level of excitement when you're losing money and no one is interested in what you're doing. It's really hard not to take something like that personally and it really messed with my head. I've been feeling worthless and directionless for a while. It's really hard to sit at home while my boyfriend goes to work, class, and his internship. He's building a career and I'm sitting on my ass looking for a part time job that I don't want in a place I don't like. So far our relationship hasn't suffered but I can't say I'm not even a little bit resentful. He's on his way to bigger and better things and I'm sitting around waiting until it's my turn to go to graduate school.
My mood is made more sour because my electronics keep breaking. My DSLR broke when we moved here. My computer's battery crapped out a couple months ago and now the computer itself is breaking down. Slowly but steadily it's losing function. Now it's making this awful grinding sound when I boot it up and I have no idea what's causing it. All I know is I can't afford to fix it or replace is without help. I've asked or help from my grandparents and mother to buy a new computer for my birthday this March. I've gotten a very wishy-washy "I'll talk to your grandmother about it" from my mother. Nothing more concrete than that. Every time I start my computer I expect it to refuse to boot up. It's not long for this world and the idea of not having a computer is pretty scary in a world where everything requires a computer. I have my iPhone for simple internet things like checking email and searching for simple things on the internet but I can't download applications to schools on my phone. My little notebook mouse just crapped out too so now I can't even distract myself with World of Warcraft. I'm feeling very what's the point of it all these days. Applying to grad school for 2011 seems very far away and it hasn't been enough to sustain me. I'm stuck in a rut and I don't know how to get out. It doesn't seem like any amount of positive thinking is helping me. I can't seem to force my brain into happy thoughts while I sit here and waste two years of my life in Massachusetts.
I'm not having any more luck finding a new job than I was selling jewelry. Actually I'd say I'm having more luck with the jewelry even though I've only made one sale in the last couple months. I've come to accept that only a very few people want my jewelry. There are so many resin artists on Etsy and most of them make more interesting stuff than I do. I can't compete. The resin thing just isn't working so it's time to pack it up and move on. I'm trying to put my efforts towards building a portfolio for graduate school but it's hard not to feel depressed over my failure. I was so excited to start making jewelry full time but it's so hard to maintain that level of excitement when you're losing money and no one is interested in what you're doing. It's really hard not to take something like that personally and it really messed with my head. I've been feeling worthless and directionless for a while. It's really hard to sit at home while my boyfriend goes to work, class, and his internship. He's building a career and I'm sitting on my ass looking for a part time job that I don't want in a place I don't like. So far our relationship hasn't suffered but I can't say I'm not even a little bit resentful. He's on his way to bigger and better things and I'm sitting around waiting until it's my turn to go to graduate school.
My mood is made more sour because my electronics keep breaking. My DSLR broke when we moved here. My computer's battery crapped out a couple months ago and now the computer itself is breaking down. Slowly but steadily it's losing function. Now it's making this awful grinding sound when I boot it up and I have no idea what's causing it. All I know is I can't afford to fix it or replace is without help. I've asked or help from my grandparents and mother to buy a new computer for my birthday this March. I've gotten a very wishy-washy "I'll talk to your grandmother about it" from my mother. Nothing more concrete than that. Every time I start my computer I expect it to refuse to boot up. It's not long for this world and the idea of not having a computer is pretty scary in a world where everything requires a computer. I have my iPhone for simple internet things like checking email and searching for simple things on the internet but I can't download applications to schools on my phone. My little notebook mouse just crapped out too so now I can't even distract myself with World of Warcraft. I'm feeling very what's the point of it all these days. Applying to grad school for 2011 seems very far away and it hasn't been enough to sustain me. I'm stuck in a rut and I don't know how to get out. It doesn't seem like any amount of positive thinking is helping me. I can't seem to force my brain into happy thoughts while I sit here and waste two years of my life in Massachusetts.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
IT'S RANT TIME!!
I've talked about this a lot, because it's something I feel very passionate about. I'm going to talk about it more because it just keeps happening. No one seems to learn. Rantiness follows the jump.
Thursday, January 7, 2010
OH VACATION
I'm back from a four day romp in NYC! Two friends from out of town were visiting over New Years and we had a big NYC adventure planned. Good times were had by all. I really enjoyed shopping in Brooklyn. Thrift stores are your friend! Brooklyn was my favorite part. We only spent the one day in Brooklyn which I was sad about. If I decided to go to NYC for graduate school I'll want to live in Brooklyn for sure. It's (mostly) more affordable and I like the atmosphere better. The streets are wider, the buildings shorter, less crowded. You're not constantly getting bumped into by tourists who can't walk and stare at the big buildings at the same time. Brooklyn is the place for me!
Manhattan was cool too, don't get me wrong. You can't MOVE though. People are always standing around in the middle of the side walk, gaping at things or yelling on their cell phones. There's always someone in your way in Manhattan. At least in the parts we were walking around. There are probably more mellow parts of the island but we didn't find any of them.
Next time I go I just want to explore. There's so much to discover in New York! The city is designed to take a lot of money from people who don't know any better and we sure didn't! I want to find the good places to shop/eat/play that don't cost an arm and a leg. I know there are lots because people do have to live in the city on budgets. There are lots of poor, low income, and middle class people who live in New York. I want to find the places they do their every day things. Mostly I want to experience what it's like to live there for myself.
I was hoping to see more weirdos! Maybe the cold keeps them covered up in their wool coats. I know I was bundled up and couldn't show my true colors until I found an awesome mustard yellow and red plaid coat for $18.50 at Buffalo Exchange! The first two days in the city were spent wearing my grandmother's old coat. It's nice and warm but it's totally shapeless. There are trash bags out there with more shape to them! I was really excited to find the new coat because it has a shape to it! I felt much sassier in my new coat! I just don't feel myself if I'm not wearing something bold and colorful. As much as I get annoyed when people stare at me I would feel much more uncomfortable if I wore all black and grey. I would rather deal with ignorant people who can't appreciate bright colors and bold patterns than dress to disappear.
ANYWAY! I really liked being in the city. We had good times, we ate AWESOME pizza and Thai food (Tom Yum noodle soup!) and did some very fun shopping. I got a new tube of Urban Decay Primer Potion (which I love) because my old tube was all dried out and almost totally empty. Very glad to have that particular beauty basic. Wearing eyeshadow before having the PP was such a waste!
This post is such a mishmash. I'll make another one in the next few days about some items I've received in the mail that will really change the look of my Etsy shop for the better! I'm still waiting on a few items to arrive but I have enough to get started and I can't wait to get back to work! I have so many ideas floating around in the ol' head. There's so much more to come!
Manhattan was cool too, don't get me wrong. You can't MOVE though. People are always standing around in the middle of the side walk, gaping at things or yelling on their cell phones. There's always someone in your way in Manhattan. At least in the parts we were walking around. There are probably more mellow parts of the island but we didn't find any of them.
Next time I go I just want to explore. There's so much to discover in New York! The city is designed to take a lot of money from people who don't know any better and we sure didn't! I want to find the good places to shop/eat/play that don't cost an arm and a leg. I know there are lots because people do have to live in the city on budgets. There are lots of poor, low income, and middle class people who live in New York. I want to find the places they do their every day things. Mostly I want to experience what it's like to live there for myself.
I was hoping to see more weirdos! Maybe the cold keeps them covered up in their wool coats. I know I was bundled up and couldn't show my true colors until I found an awesome mustard yellow and red plaid coat for $18.50 at Buffalo Exchange! The first two days in the city were spent wearing my grandmother's old coat. It's nice and warm but it's totally shapeless. There are trash bags out there with more shape to them! I was really excited to find the new coat because it has a shape to it! I felt much sassier in my new coat! I just don't feel myself if I'm not wearing something bold and colorful. As much as I get annoyed when people stare at me I would feel much more uncomfortable if I wore all black and grey. I would rather deal with ignorant people who can't appreciate bright colors and bold patterns than dress to disappear.
ANYWAY! I really liked being in the city. We had good times, we ate AWESOME pizza and Thai food (Tom Yum noodle soup!) and did some very fun shopping. I got a new tube of Urban Decay Primer Potion (which I love) because my old tube was all dried out and almost totally empty. Very glad to have that particular beauty basic. Wearing eyeshadow before having the PP was such a waste!
This post is such a mishmash. I'll make another one in the next few days about some items I've received in the mail that will really change the look of my Etsy shop for the better! I'm still waiting on a few items to arrive but I have enough to get started and I can't wait to get back to work! I have so many ideas floating around in the ol' head. There's so much more to come!
Monday, December 28, 2009
INSPIRATION MAKES THE WORLD GO ROUND
I just wanted to make a quick little list of people who inspire me to create, to keep trying, to work my hardest, and to be my best!
First up we have Twinkie Chan!
(image source)
First up we have Twinkie Chan!
(image source)
This woman inspired me to learn how to crochet! I had a couple months of being marooned in the desert at my mother's house after graduating college. I needed a distraction from the misery of doing absolutely nothing all day (it was too hot to cast resin cause of no a/c in 100ยบ heat) so I decided to learn a new craft! I fell in love with crochet. Twinkie was a huge part of that. I saw the sculptural potential in crochet that knitting just didn't seem to possess. My mom is a knitter and I always wanted to learn a yarn craft to feel closer to her but I just never could wrap my head around it. Crochet was a different matter. I started to understand it almost instantly. I'm not a whiz or anything but i've started sculpting with crochet and it feels amazing. My portfolio for my MFA applications is going to be so soft and fuzzy! Thanks Twinkie!
Next we have Athina LaBelle of Eclectic Essentials Boutique!
(image source)
I just recently discovered Athina's work. She inspired me to start playing more with pastel colors in my resin! I always left the pastel colors in a corner, all neglected. I love pastel but I would forget about it in favor of brighter, more saturated colors because that's what I usually am drawn to. Seeing how this stay-at-home mom/jewelry designer used pastel colors to such wonderful ends I was really inspired to start playing with them myself. I've fallen so much in love with my pastel glitters! I've been mixing pastel with bold saturated colors and the result is really great. I'm loving it and loving her jewelry! She's also inspired me in part to start working with chunky curb chains and beading for the necklace part of my pendants. I'm so tired of slapping a pendant that I worked hard on onto a commercial ball chain with no personality. I want my chains to be just as DIY and fun as the jewelry they suspend.
And now for Amy Shrinkle!
(image source)
This girl makes some of the most awesome clothes! Not only that but she makes her clothes in more than just her own size. I love that! There are a number of other handmade clothing sellers who ONLY make clothes in their own size. I might not be a fatty anymore but I'm tall and have wide hips so a size 4-6 is out of the question for me! Even at my skinniest (I looked like an unhealthy twig!) I was a size 10-11 because of my height and bone structure. It feels really good to know that there are designers who understand that there are different types of girls out there and they ALL deserve to look fabulous! I can't wait for the launch of her Sugarpill cosmetics line. She always has amazing makeup on and I can't wait to see what the mind behind her makeup looks has been working on for 4 years! You know that after 4 years of conceptualizing and building that her makeup isn't going to be repackaged junk that you can get for $5 an ounce. It's going to be bold, original and fun. I'm so looking forward to it!
This next girl was a close friend some years ago. We lost touch a little bit but I still hold her in my heart. I'm talking about Roux!
(image source)
Hilary (aka Roux aka Tom Hoshino) was a really good friend back in the early 2000's. I even went to visit her in Cincinnati! I had a blast with her. There was a group of us on VLC (before it was mostly just furry porn). We all drew each other's characters constantly. We talked all the time. It was a good feeling to be part of that group. I miss all those people. I started moving away from the anthro scene but I still love the colorful characters and I don't think there's anything weird about anthro art. The porn can be a little weird but it's not like these people are having sex with REAL animals so whatever. I would never be an advocate of art censorship! Anyway, Hilary still really inspires me! Thanks to her I've been feeling the drawing itch a lot lately. I even drew today! It felt great and I would really like to get back into illustration for fun. I hated being an Illustration major in school but I love drawing. I think I just needed a drawing hiatus. NOT drawing did me a lot of favors but it's starting to feel wrong. I know I have a lot of talent in that area and it's silly to waste it. I know that there are people who would be happy to hear that I'm putting pencil to paper again. Maybe some day my illustrations will be popping up on DeviantArt again! I miss you Hilaroux. You were and still are a big influence on me!
And finally (for now) Sam MacKenzie!
(image source)
I LOVE this kid's work. Ha. I say "kid" but he's only a year younger than I am. This Australian is a favorite artist of mine. has been for years. I really look forward to his big sketch compilations. I think I enjoy artists' sketches and unfinished doodles more than their completed pieces. I feel like you learn more about their process and how their brains work from their doodles. I love his range! From pretty girls to silly doodles to big burly men with arms the size of trucks. His drawings can make me laugh and I do love to laugh. Looking at his work makes me BURN to draw things. Particularly cute girls in their underoos! He seems to really understand anatomy to the point of warping and bending it to his will. I like that. I also love boobies! Boobies make me happy. So thanks Sam! Thanks for boobies and inspiration galore!
That's it for now! There are a billion more people and things that inspire me every day. Too many to list really. But as of right this minute these are the people who are on my mind. I wanted to give them some credit for helping me keep the creative juices flowing! Without people to inspire us we would never do anything new or original. No artist can exist in a vacuum. We need other people around us doing things, making things, thinking, breathing. Otherwise we become stagnant and boring. With all the inspiration on the internet there's NO reason to be boring or uninspired. There are a million reasons to make something!
What inspires you internets? Colors? People? Books? Places? We all draw inspiration from somewhere. I would love to hear about yours!!
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